F. A. R. T.: Top Secret! No Kids Allowed!

Item: 293356 Model: 9781534436190

F. A. R. T.: Top Secret! No Kids Allowed!

Item: 293356 Model: 9781534436190
$9.99

Product Features:

  • Young reader
  • Hardcover
  • 9-13 years
  • 144 pages
  • Bakalian, Peter and Lucas, Luke
  • See All Features

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    When a young teen discovers a top-secret parenting manual, it’s kids versus grown-ups in this kooky, illustrated middle grade thriller with nonstop, seat-of-your-pants action that will delight fans of Jarrett Lerner and Stuart Gibbs.

    When a tween boy [Codename: Furious Popcorn] picks up what he thinks is a cookbook and finds a diabolical parenting manual, his world turns upside down. The Ultimate Guide to Hacking Your Kids was written by an organization called F.A.R.T. (Families Against Rotten Teens), a secret society of grizzled parents whose origins date back to antiquity.

    FP is determined to get to the bottom of this, but when he begins investigating F.A.R.T., the manual goes missing, his parents deny knowing anything about any kind of book, and—maybe strangest of all—kids at school start listening to their parents and teachers. What kid would ever do that?

    F.A.R.T. proves to be more than just some gassy acronym and parental rules and regulations when FP and the Only Onlys, his best friends since preschool, discover F.A.R.T.’s grand plan: a brain modem that can turn kids into well-behaved zombies!

    This wacky crew has no choice but to find out who’s behind the nefarious organization and save young people the world over from total F.A.R.T. domination!

    Product Features:

  • Young reader
  • Hardcover
  • 9-13 years
  • 144 pages
  • Bakalian, Peter and Lucas, Luke

  • (Model 9781534436190)
    Model Number9781534436190
    Estimated Delivery5-7 Business Days
    upc9781534436190
    TitleF. A. R. T.: Top Secret! No Kids Allowed!
    AuthorPeter Bakalian, Luke Lucas
    ISBN9781534436190
    Published Date5/3/2022
    PublisherSimon & Schuster
    FormatHardcover
    Number of Pages144 Pages
    GenreYoung Reader

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    *Bulk online sales are final and cannot be returned; reference Terms of Use available on BJs.com by clicking here, or contact your BJ’s business partner with questions.


    If you have ordered one of these non-returnable items, please inspect the item carefully and if possible, refuse delivery of incorrect or damaged products. Once the item has been accepted it will be deemed to be the correct item and in good working condition. Any issues that arise after the item is signed for must be resolved through the manufacturer’s warranty.

    Returning an Item Online

    Please see BJs.com's return policy before initiating a return.

    You may return your item at any BJ's Club location or by following the instructions below.

    1. Select “Order Status” from the top navigation of any page.
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    PLEASE NOTE: you will not be allowed to initiate a return beyond 30 days from your date of shipping. After 30 days, please contact member care for return instructions.



    Damaged Orders
    If a signature is required please inspect your package carefully before signing for it. If after accepting the package you determine that there are damaged or defective parts, please contact the manufacturer for replacement parts. For further assistance, contact BJ’s Member Care. Do not discard the boxes or packing materials, as they may be needed to ship the item back.



    Shipping Error
    If you receive an incorrect product, please review your order information to be certain that there were no errors in the order process. If you determine that you received an item you did not order, please return your product to the nearest BJ’s Club location or initiate a return online (see “Returning an Item” above for instructions).



    Return Shipping Costs
    If you refuse your delivery without inspection, miss your delivery appointment(s) or return a non-defective or undamaged product, you will incur original shipping charges along with actual return shipping fees. In the event that your returned merchandise was mis-shipped, damaged or defective, BJ’s Member Care team will be happy to reimburse you for return shipping costs. Please contact BJ’s Member Care and we will be able to assist you.

    When a young teen discovers a top-secret parenting manual, it’s kids versus grown-ups in this kooky, illustrated middle grade thriller with nonstop, seat-of-your-pants action that will delight fans of Jarrett Lerner and Stuart Gibbs.

    When a tween boy [Codename: Furious Popcorn] picks up what he thinks is a cookbook and finds a diabolical parenting manual, his world turns upside down. The Ultimate Guide to Hacking Your Kids was written by an organization called F.A.R.T. (Families Against Rotten Teens), a secret society of grizzled parents whose origins date back to antiquity.

    FP is determined to get to the bottom of this, but when he begins investigating F.A.R.T., the manual goes missing, his parents deny knowing anything about any kind of book, and—maybe strangest of all—kids at school start listening to their parents and teachers. What kid would ever do that?

    F.A.R.T. proves to be more than just some gassy acronym and parental rules and regulations when FP and the Only Onlys, his best friends since preschool, discover F.A.R.T.’s grand plan: a brain modem that can turn kids into well-behaved zombies!

    This wacky crew has no choice but to find out who’s behind the nefarious organization and save young people the world over from total F.A.R.T. domination!

    Product Features:

  • Young reader
  • Hardcover
  • 9-13 years
  • 144 pages
  • Bakalian, Peter and Lucas, Luke

  • (Model 9781534436190)
    Model Number9781534436190
    Estimated Delivery5-7 Business Days
    upc9781534436190
    TitleF. A. R. T.: Top Secret! No Kids Allowed!
    AuthorPeter Bakalian, Luke Lucas
    ISBN9781534436190
    Published Date5/3/2022
    PublisherSimon & Schuster
    FormatHardcover
    Number of Pages144 Pages
    GenreYoung Reader

    Thank you for submitting your question to BJs.

    BJs.com Return Policy

    BJ's selects the highest quality Merchandise for our Members and stands behind the products we sell. If you are not completely satisfied with your purchase, you are entitled to a refund or exchange subject to the following guidelines. Please return your product to the nearest BJ's Club location or by following the instructions here or email us at CustomerCare@bjs.com.


    Proper Conditions for Return and Credit
    Returned merchandise must be in new condition with its original packing and accessories intact. Items purchased over 1 year ago will not be considered in new condition. If you are returning a product please check to make sure your return meets the following conditions:

    • Computers and electronics are returnable within 90 days of the shipping date
    • CDs, DVDs, computer software and video games must be unopened

    We regret that BJ’s cannot cover the cost of shipping for products returned due to buyer’s remorse.
    We cannot accept returns of:

    • Gift cards.
    • Apparel marked as final sale.
    • Opened CDs, DVDs, computer software and video games.
    • Items with gas, oil or fuel added.
    • Items restricted by law.
    • Jewelry and watches purchased in-Club after 8/3/2017.
    • Bulk purchases of ten (10) or more units of the same item purchased online in the same transaction where the total price exceeds $1,000.00.
    • Products under a manufacturer's warranty which have service center only restrictions. Please contact the manufacturer for assistance with products such as:
    • Awnings
    • Boats
    • Gas Powered Outdoor Equipment
    • Items with gas, oil, or fuel added
    • Living Room Sets
    • Major Appliances after 90 days
    • Mattresses over 1 year old
    • Pools
    • Screenhouses
    • Sheds
    • Spas & Saunas
    • Swing Sets
    • Trampolines
    • Massage Chairs

    *Bulk online sales are final and cannot be returned; reference Terms of Use available on BJs.com by clicking here, or contact your BJ’s business partner with questions.


    If you have ordered one of these non-returnable items, please inspect the item carefully and if possible, refuse delivery of incorrect or damaged products. Once the item has been accepted it will be deemed to be the correct item and in good working condition. Any issues that arise after the item is signed for must be resolved through the manufacturer’s warranty.

    Returning an Item Online

    Please see BJs.com's return policy before initiating a return.

    You may return your item at any BJ's Club location or by following the instructions below.

    1. Select “Order Status” from the top navigation of any page.
    2. If you placed your order while signed in to your online account, please sign in to your account using your username and password.
      If you placed your order while shopping as a guest, please enter your order number, recipient's email address, and the ship-to ZIP code, then click “Continue.”
    3. Your order information should now be displayed. Please review it and click the “Return”" link next to the item you would like to return.
    4. Select from the dropdown list the reason that most closely corresponds to your reason for returning the item, the package condition, and any comments you would like to make.
    5. Select “Continue.”
    6. Your return authorization request has now been made and you will receive an email within 3-5 business days (often sooner), with complete return instructions. If you do not receive an email with complete return instructions within 3-5 business days, please contact us at 866-4BJS-WEB (866-425-7932). BJ’s Member Care Representatives are available Monday - Friday, 9AM - 7PM E.T., Saturday, 9AM - 6PM E.T. and Sunday, Noon - 6PM E.T.

    PLEASE NOTE: you will not be allowed to initiate a return beyond 30 days from your date of shipping. After 30 days, please contact member care for return instructions.



    Damaged Orders
    If a signature is required please inspect your package carefully before signing for it. If after accepting the package you determine that there are damaged or defective parts, please contact the manufacturer for replacement parts. For further assistance, contact BJ’s Member Care. Do not discard the boxes or packing materials, as they may be needed to ship the item back.



    Shipping Error
    If you receive an incorrect product, please review your order information to be certain that there were no errors in the order process. If you determine that you received an item you did not order, please return your product to the nearest BJ’s Club location or initiate a return online (see “Returning an Item” above for instructions).



    Return Shipping Costs
    If you refuse your delivery without inspection, miss your delivery appointment(s) or return a non-defective or undamaged product, you will incur original shipping charges along with actual return shipping fees. In the event that your returned merchandise was mis-shipped, damaged or defective, BJ’s Member Care team will be happy to reimburse you for return shipping costs. Please contact BJ’s Member Care and we will be able to assist you.